“Good communication is the bridge between confusion and clarity”- Nat Turner

In relationships, one of the hardest skills to master is healthy and effective communication. Realistically, we might not be able to completely eliminate disagreements and misunderstandings from our day to day life, but applying communication techniques could potentially increase connectedness as well as create a safe emotional environment for both partners.

The following are some skills that we can use when communicating with our partners-

  • “I” Statements : I feel ____ when _____ because ______. What I need is _________.
  • Be kind : it is important to come from a place of kindness and grace when we are upset, if we are able to remember to express ourselves through kindness, it might help to lower heightened emotions in intense situations .
  • Communicate empathy : name the feeling + validate the feeling. Empathy is shown when you communicate that your partner’s thoughts, feelings, and needs make sense to you and that you understand their experience. That does not mean that you necessarily agree with them. It is okay if you don’t agree with them, empathizing does not devalue your interpretation of events.
  • Mindful listening: listen to understand rather than respond
  • Practice gratitude: share thoughts of appreciation with your partner, creating a routine daily expressions of gratitude can be mutually beneficial
  • Create a habit of reunion: such as hugging, kissing, dancing whenever you see each other

There are many different effective ways that couples can communicate. Through rituals and healthy habits we are able to create connections that we can count on. By using some of these skills, we can help to increase healthy interactions and reconnect during a time filled with uncertainty and stress.  Do you think couples therapy would be helpful for your relationship? We can help. Click here to connect to Charlene’s page.

​Charlene Kwintner, LCSW

Treats Ages: 16 and up.
Specialty Areas:  Co-Occurring Disorders (Substance Abuse & Mental Health), LGBTQIA, Grief/Loss.
Insurances Accepted: Horizon BCBS, Cigna, and accepts out-of-network benefits for all other insurances